Should, i know what i wanna?

hmmmmmmm,no this isn't one of those night time thoughts which creep up cause you have all the time in the world to fan those stupid thoughts!!!But this is one of those thoughts which pass my mind from time to time,like SSSSSSSSSSWWWWWWWWISH............yeah and the second time they enter my brain shack its slower,cause i start taking them seriously.OK,Question:Should you know MORE then you are suppose to?I mean could it be any good or is it only a way to mess up your already messed up thoughts?I mean there is always a line right between curiosity and well DANGEROUS curiosity.Dangerous well cause on the other side of it,which is the fulfillment of it er......things get pretty ugly......FOR YOU!Yeah i almost pointed a finger there,hahhahahha!Anyway,yeah so we were talking about curiosity,ah i have oodles of it and i hide it.......hahahha..its almost like me having my"coming out" moments right now HAHAHHAHHAHHAHAH,only that m straight.......yeah well!
I don't know you know,sometimes i feel i have a right when i just need to know,but well then i get all.......ah man i cant deal with my own life why should i go about snooping into someones shitty underpants,hehehheheh.................ah THE FILTH!!!sigh,seriously when do you know yer trespassing on someones personal space?I mean I've never had any issues but i just wonder,IF.............IF(I said "IF")I let go........how ugly could it be?AND its not something i associate with one person,I'm talking about everyone i know of........i mean when you come down to "I fucking wanna know" its not too nice,the sound of it..............right?you know i always felt if someone wants you to know something they will come and tell you all by themselves,but well WHAT DID I KNOW,they're all a bunch of attention seekers,AND I COUNT MYSELF IN TOO!!!You always need a bit of "temme please,come on,its me,you could tell me!"
DAMN!!!You know when do i feel guilty,i feel guilty when i know a bit more than what the person thinks i know........i feel i spoil it for myself,I lose from both sides,HOW?I'll tell you,see if the person tells me.....i feel sad cause well i know it already or well cause its a sad thing to know like a confession.........i feel sad cause i already saw it coming and i COULDN'T do anything,helpless!and well the other side..........if the person doesn't tell me I'm sad again,cause i was deprived of it.......OH THAT HURTS!
Sometimes i feel i have too many secrets,and sorting them out becomes an issue.It not fun you know too have too many of them cause then you've to play safe,not let out...........its like you're in soundproof room and you cant really do anything.......you gotta break down those walls,to let out,TO GET OUT!And my biggest secret is well,that I AM CURIOUS.........i wanna know,i wanna know why things happen and why they don't............but well keeping that relatively cool, composed "i don't really wanna know" gimmick doesn't really let me,SAD!!!!Gimmicks,oh come on all o you play them everyday........so well don't sympathize with me,no ones any good.And you know what its a two way road,if one doesn't be so stuck up the other wont reciprocate the same way,so we're all at fault somewhere............and well i don't even feel better blaming it on the others,I know i do it somewhere too!I think we spoil it for ourselves and then we go about looking for someone else to clean the mess.......AH WHAT LOSERS!WHAT BABYS!And well this bears testimony.........I can see it coming..........I SO can.........sigh.......and i cant do anything about it.........MAN I WANT A CHANGE O PLANS!!!!!!!

ps-Plans.........eh........like i have any major ones.........no i do i think...........and all i can think of is a dialogue-"One woman,one zipka one life".........hahahhahhahhaha,AND checkout this flick "little black diaries",I felt DISCOVERED, man!!!